This is default featured slide 1 title

Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.This theme is Bloggerized by Lasantha Bandara - Premiumbloggertemplates.com.

This is default featured slide 2 title

Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.This theme is Bloggerized by Lasantha Bandara - Premiumbloggertemplates.com.

This is default featured slide 3 title

Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.This theme is Bloggerized by Lasantha Bandara - Premiumbloggertemplates.com.

This is default featured slide 4 title

Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.This theme is Bloggerized by Lasantha Bandara - Premiumbloggertemplates.com.

This is default featured slide 5 title

Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.This theme is Bloggerized by Lasantha Bandara - Premiumbloggertemplates.com.

Showing posts with label JOKES. Show all posts
Showing posts with label JOKES. Show all posts

Friday, 10 June 2016

Adidas In 'Epic' Colombia Spelling Mistake

Social media users took to Twitter to mock the spelling of the South American country’s name as "Columbia".
Users posted images apparently taken from sports store promotional material in recent days.
The marketing images, made for the Copa America tournament by the German company, feature stars such as Real Madrid's James Rodriguez.
One Twitter user wrote: "Seriously, @adidasfootball – IT'S COLOMBIA, not Columbia! Colossal mistake for such a brand. Unacceptable"
Another said: "Someone please tell @Adidas that they misspelled Colombia in their entire campaign… #ItsColombiaNotColumbia."
The blunder was also described on Twitter as an "epic mistake".
A spokeswoman for Adidas said: "We value our partnership with the Colombian Football Federation and apologise for our mistake. We removed these graphics and are quickly installing new versions."
She said the mistake only happened in the US.
Colombia's football team appears to have taken the controversy in its stride. Colombia beat Paraguay 2-1 on Tuesday night to progress to the Copa America quarter finals.

Wednesday, 12 September 2012

This Serious

U dey do opening prayer 4 Night Club.
- Na God go slap ur mouth.
U come back from dubai dey form British accent.
- Na rat go chop ur mouth
U be house boy u come dey play Rick Ross - I am the Boss.
-4 where na.....mumu
U dey add water to egg say e go plenty when u fry am.
- Why u no add yeast join am....olodo.
U no go university, and u dey find ur name for NYSC posting.
- Na yeye dey worri u.
House dey burn, you wan usegas do fire extinguisher
- Hahahahaha....u don die.
U de say Terry G's music dey inspire u
- unto which level!! madness
U carry candle dey look for where fuel dey smell from.
-continue u go soon see am
U call MTN to tell dem sey ur free browsing has stopped working.
- Lolzzzzzzzzz... ..mad man
When pastor talk say 'Do something crazy for the Lord'u come carry church offering run
- na who wan chase u?.....
U read dis & u no send am wen u smile finish
- na only u de Stingy 2 d last...4ward make evrybody laff Joor.....

This Serious

U dey do opening prayer 4 Night Club.
- Na God go slap ur mouth.
U come back from dubai dey form British accent.
- Na rat go chop ur mouth
U be house boy u come dey play Rick Ross - I am the Boss.
-4 where na.....mumu
U dey add water to egg say e go plenty when u fry am.
- Why u no add yeast join am....olodo.
U no go university, and u dey find ur name for NYSC posting.
- Na yeye dey worri u.
House dey burn, you wan usegas do fire extinguisher
- Hahahahaha....u don die.
U de say Terry G's music dey inspire u
- unto which level!! madness
U carry candle dey look for where fuel dey smell from.
-continue u go soon see am
U call MTN to tell dem sey ur free browsing has stopped working.
- Lolzzzzzzzzz... ..mad man
When pastor talk say 'Do something crazy for the Lord'u come carry church offering run
- na who wan chase u?.....
U read dis & u no send am wen u smile finish
- na only u de Stingy 2 d last...4ward make evrybody laff Joor.....

This Serious

U dey do opening prayer 4 Night Club.
- Na God go slap ur mouth.
U come back from dubai dey form British accent.
- Na rat go chop ur mouth
U be house boy u come dey play Rick Ross - I am the Boss.
-4 where na.....mumu
U dey add water to egg say e go plenty when u fry am.
- Why u no add yeast join am....olodo.
U no go university, and u dey find ur name for NYSC posting.
- Na yeye dey worri u.
House dey burn, you wan usegas do fire extinguisher
- Hahahahaha....u don die.
U de say Terry G's music dey inspire u
- unto which level!! madness
U carry candle dey look for where fuel dey smell from.
-continue u go soon see am
U call MTN to tell dem sey ur free browsing has stopped working.
- Lolzzzzzzzzz... ..mad man
When pastor talk say 'Do something crazy for the Lord'u come carry church offering run
- na who wan chase u?.....
U read dis & u no send am wen u smile finish
- na only u de Stingy 2 d last...4ward make evrybody laff Joor.....

Tuesday, 4 September 2012

who is wiser

Girl:Honey??
Boy:Yes,sweety? ?
Girl:Honey, i like this shoe a lot but
i forgot my
wallet
at home,could you pliz give me
N2000 to buy it?
Boy:There is no Atm close here
but take this N100,
go
home and bring ur wallet.
Question:
Is the guy=
1)Economical.
2)Sharp minded.
3)Wicked.
4)Reasonable.
5)Stingy.
6)Stupid?

Friday, 31 August 2012

chelsea

I'm a chelsea fan but.......
Whats the MATA with chelsea? To be FRANK we look so TERRYfied, and we just fell like a MARIN shipwreck.. Can somebody CECH the score
board plz?.. Whaaat!!? 4-1 !? Thatsa HAZARD.!!

Boil

A guy picks up a girl in a bar,
takes her home and they
started getting along.
He starts sucking her boobs
and milk came out, he
stopped
and ask, hey are you pregnant?
She says , that wasn't the nipple,
its a boil....

Wednesday, 29 August 2012

laff it off

LAFF IT OFF A teacher 1ce asked
her pupil to construct a sentence
using d word "beautiful" twice in a
sentence. D first student sed my
sister has a beautiful watch dat
matches wit her beautiful skin.d
teacher clappd 4 d student.A
2ndstudent sed "my uncle bought
a beautiful dress 4 his beautiful
wife,d teacher clappd 4 d student
den a girl stood up nd said"my
sista got pregnant,and wen she
told my father,he said beautiful......
very beautiful.

Monday, 27 August 2012

JOKE LOL

WOMAN: My Husband is not
interested in sex. DOCTOR: Ok! give these pills to
him. Everyday, put 1 pill in his tea.
the woman did and they had sex which
they enjoyed. Next day she puts 2 pills
in his tea and they enjoyed much more sex. 3rd day, she emptied the
whole bottle in his
tea. Two days later Doctor called
to know the progress. Son picked and
replied:
"Mom is in coma at d moment, Aunt is in hospital, Maid
is suing Dad for rape, My own arse hurts and
bleeding and Dad
is still running naked in d garden,
shouting Bingo! Bingo!! Bingo!!! Even the Dogs are
running 4 their lives!

JOKE LOl

In An Alcohol Factory The Regular Taster Died And
The Director Started Looking For A New One To Hire. A Drunkard With Ragged Dirty Look Came To Apply
For The Position. The Director Of The Factory Wondered How To Send
Him Away! They Tested Him They Gave Him A Glass With A Drink � He Tried It And
Said, �It�s Red Wine, A Muscat, Three Years Old,
Grown On A North Slope, Matured In Steel
Containers.� That�s Correct Said The Boss. Another Glass. �It�s Red Wine, Cabernet, Eight Years
Old, A Southwestern Slope, Oak Barrels� �Correct� Now, The Director Was Astonished � Amazed He Winked At His Secretary To Suggest Something.
She Brought In A Glass Of Urine. The Alcoholic Tried It ! �It�s Of A Blonde -26 Years
Old- Pregnant ! Probably Third Month Now � And If
You Don�t Give Me The Job, I�ll Tell Who The Father
Is !� He Got The Job!

JOKE LOL

At a Sunday worship service,
Pastor said; Turn to your left and
say to your neighbour,
"neighbour, it shall be
permanent in your life". I turned
to my left and saw a cripple. Apparently confused and full of
pity, i stared at him and said;
Please don't mind Pastor. He
replied; Ofego, na God save
you, i wish you talk am, i for
take slap scatter your face.

JOKES LOL

A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in
his room, so he decided to send a mail to his wife. However, he accidentally typed the wrong email
address, and without realizing he sent the mail to a
widow who has just returned from her husband's
funeral. The widow decided to check her mail, expecting
condolence messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message she fainted. The son rushed in to the room, found his mother on
the floor and saw the computer screen which read: "To My Loving Wife, I know you are surprised to hear from me. They have
Computers here and we are allowed to send mails to
loved ones. I've just been checked in. How are you
and the kids, the place is really nice but am lonely
here. I have made necessary arrangement for your
arrival tomorrow. Expecting you darling. I can't wait to see you, sweet dreams till then" Son fainted..

JOKE LOL

A guy asked a girl in a library;
“Do you
mind if I sit besides you”? The
girl
answered with a loud voice;
"I DON’T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT
WITH
YOUUU!!!”. All the students in
the
library
started staring at the guy and he was
embarrassed.
After a couple of minutes, the
girl
walked
quietly to the guy’s table and she told
him
“I study psychology and I
know what a
man is thinking, I guess u felt
embarrassed right? The guy responded
with a loud voice: N200
JUST FOR
ONE
NIGHT THAT’S TOO MUCH
Ooo!!! ...and all
the people in the library
looked at the
girl
in shock and the guy
whispered in her ears; “I study Law and I know
how to
make someone feel guilty !! Hit like guys !

Funny

Love ur lover like Romeo,
fight 4 her lyk Spartacus,
rescue her like Michael Scofield,
protect her lyk Jack Bauer,
dnt cheat on her lyk Tiger woods,
neva beat her lyk Chris Brown, spend time on her lyk Manchester
City,
dnt b stingy lyk Arsenal,
win trophies 4 her lyk Man United,
boast abt her lyk Chelsea,
have confidence in her lyk Barcelona.
Don't dissapoint her like Liverpool
FC
Dnt promise thngs u cnt fulfil like
sata

Sunday, 26 August 2012

Lawyer Joke